You just made me feel so damn special
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
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i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
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that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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