# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
