I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
