The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My Higher Power is John Stamos
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
