He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
