Screwed.edu
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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