Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize