I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize