and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize