He asked to "fluff my boner.."
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
