Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize