Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
