Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
