Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
