you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
