you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
