Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
