I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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