He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
