Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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