Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
