Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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