Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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