dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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