There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
