I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
