Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
