I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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