Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize