We won't sleep together?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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