dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize