i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize