I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize