I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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