dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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