I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize