I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize