so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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