therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I have tasted many bathrooms
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
