Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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