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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless

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• (631): View more from New York

  You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows

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• (713): View more from Texas

  He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance

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• (510): View more from California

  no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.

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• (619): View more from California

  I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Spopky scrzy skeletonssz

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?

  (1-289): View more from Ontario

  When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.

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• (916): View more from California

  hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.

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