Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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