Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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