First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
