I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
being pregnant is like rehab
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
