She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
