So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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