That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
PANTIES FOUND
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