Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire