Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
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