I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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