Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
